Time to take the tree down
And cancel Christmas cheer
Put away the Christmas cards
All ready for next year
Cos no one's ever sent you
A card for quite a while
And yet you've still got hundreds
In one great bloody pile
Which every year...recycled
Are blue tacked on your wall
To show that you are worshipped
When you got bugger all
There's twelve from Uncle Albert
And nobody would know
He sadly got run over
And died ten years ago
And one says 'Love From Nanna'
Yet you would not confess
The card is someone elses
Miss sent to your address
One year your poor postman
Died of a heart attack
And while they tried to save him
You ran off with his sack
So keep them nice and tidy
I am sure you'll get some more
It doesn't really matter
'You don't know who they're for'..
So happy Christmas Susan
Phillip, Roger ...Angela
Mike and Janet...Sylvia
And all the folk you are
Jemima ...., Auntie Violet
Uncle Cyril ...John next door
Doctor Jones , and those who live
Next street at twenty four
Dear Harry,.... Cousin Julie
They will catch you in the end
Till then you'll still be popular
By pinching cards they send