Summer Dream

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Tom Balch
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Location: Spain

Summer Dream

Postby Tom Balch » Sun Feb 08, 2015 10:03 am

In the soft light of a summers evening
I drift away to tranquil views and scenes
dreams are oh so vivid and believing.

I can feel the stress and strain are leaving
my mind and body soothed by dreams
in the soft light of a summers evening.

In pastel shades your smile is gleaming
you float towards me slowly so serene
dreams are oh so vivid and believing.

I take your hand and my heart is beaming
we feel what melting into one life means
in the soft light of a summers evening.

Vision fading, seems to have no meaning
leaves me trembling and my soul it screams
dreams are oh so vivid and believing.

As you drift away you leave me grieving
I have lost you yet again t,would seem,
in the soft light of a summers evening
dreams are oh so vivid and believing.

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Karin Anderson
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby Karin Anderson » Sun Feb 08, 2015 11:46 am

A glorious dreamy Villanelle with words that soothe the heart and soul. Yet, it is a total surprise when you expertly craft it with the same repeating lines into a nightmare. One of your very best poems Tom...

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Sandra Martyres
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby Sandra Martyres » Sun Feb 08, 2015 12:01 pm

The villanelle is a complex format Tom... Beautifully tackled in this nostalgic write..TFS

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Cindy
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby Cindy » Sun Feb 08, 2015 1:41 pm

I love the last stanza. This poem is so lovely.

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Stella
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby Stella » Sun Feb 08, 2015 5:21 pm

Bravo Tom, a delightful villanelle and so perfectly executed..

The theme is cleverly turned around as Karin has said.. well done you Tom :D

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ken.brandli
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby ken.brandli » Tue Feb 17, 2015 11:40 am

Extremely well executed technically and even more importantly, very beautifully written.

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antoine
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby antoine » Tue Feb 17, 2015 11:08 pm

I knew there was an intricate style being employed here and after reading the other comments I see it as a Villanelle - i have learned something new on my first night here. Thanks for that introduction Tom.
The morphing from light to dark is subtle and cleverly orchestrated - before the reader knows it they are in the nightmare that starts out as a truly pleasant dream. If this had been me experiencing this for real I would have certainly shed a tear upon waking. You conveyed the sense of loss very well. Great story-telling in a complex form. Bravo!

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eleanor prince
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Re: Summer Dream

Postby eleanor prince » Wed Feb 18, 2015 10:46 am

Superb mastery of both the technical and emotive aspects of this poem. I love the way you held my attention, almost lulled at first in the delightful imagery, only to be woken into that sense of profound loss with the turning point in your fine poem. Top work!


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