Circumstantial Evidence

[stevenstirk]

"Tell the truth" a cop replied
This polygraph insists you lied
It's never wrong and always right
Black is black and white is white

It must be wrong... I wazzen there
You bloody lot are so unfair

"It cant be wrong it's a machine"
The cop replied "see what I mean"

"But I'm a woman not a man
My name's Elizabeth..not Dan
The D.N.A. is not the same
I live in Walthamstow...not Spain
I'm Five feet two, not six foot four
The semen on the bedroom floor
Cannot be mine why can't you see
You need a he, and I'm a she
Those footprints must confuse you more
They're size fourteen, and I'm a four
The pubic hair you found that night
Is Afro male... I'm female.... white
And,... by the way.. My alibi
Will prove that I would never lie
To emphasize just what I mean
I spent the evening with the Queen"

"Just tell the truth", the cop replied
"The polygraph still proves you lied
This circumstantial pantomime
Just simply proves you did the crime!!!!

[Cindy]

This is hilarious. I love the cleverness of you words. Great poem.

[Stella]

Haha, well i think that cop needs a bit of sorting out..lol

I almost sang the words Steven they flowed so beautifully just like rap..

[Fay Slimm]

Haha ha - - brilliant Steve - - just goes to show the stupidity of some of these accusations - - great read as always.

[Sandra Martyres]

You never cease to amaze me with your wit Steven...another clever entertaining write.